A few days ago I posted a quote on my InstaBlog ( ReachForTheStars902 ) The quote was “Caring about everyone doesn’t require everyone to care back. Just keep doing you and spread love unconditionally.” This can mean SO many different things.
When I stumbled upon this quote on google images, it really hit me hard. If you know me personally, you’d know that I tend to be a lover ( unless you really piss me off ) I’d rather cheer on a stranger, than hate on someone that did me dirty. That’s just how I roll. I try to see the good in everything, over the bad. Even if things are really bad. I get twisted up and upset over the smallest things and I love with all my heart. I rather see the positive over the negative. Sometimes, I let the negativity get to me and I’m sure you do, too. It can be discouraging, at times. When you try and try to make a change, you try to spread the love, try to encourage others – but you get nothing but a blank stare in return. Or even better, worse than a blank stare – you get some serious shade. It’s like a giant rain cloud came and shit on your parade. You know you let it affect you. Don’t lie. Just a little bit ? I’ll be the first to admit that other people’s mood affects me, BIG TIME. Especially if I’m making an obvious effort.
Realistic Samantha – “How do you spread the love when the rest of the world is miserable ?”
Unrealistic Samantha – “Simple. Be you.”
Realistic Samantha – “Okay, Samantha.. For once, please be realistic. Its not “simple.”
Unrealistic Samantha – “Ok, you’re right. After I just had the conversation in my head, I realized that it’s not simple. It takes time and a lot of patience. An extreme amount of trial and error. It takes a lot of deleting toxic people from your life and surrounding yourself with only people who lift you up and are on the same level as you.”
What do I mean by “on the same level as you?” That’s a great question. I’ve been saying this quite frequently. Honestly, ever since I left Christina’s father, I’ve been using this term. “On my level.” I don’t mean this is an egotistical way, by any means. I actually mean this in the total opposite way. I mean it in a way of self love and self awareness. When I started saying it after I left him, I simply meant I wasn’t going to settle for someone who didn’t have the same beliefs and morals as me. I wasn’t going to subject myself to the negativity and poor behavior. I wasn’t going to let this person, or any other negative person influence me and risk my happiness. I was JUST starting my journey, on the road to success and I wasn’t letting anyone get in the way. Not even someone as important as my daughters father. Before we split up, I woke up depressed almost everyday. I didn’t feel like I had a home for me and my daughter. It was not a life I wanted for us to live. I let the actions of other people take over my life. I let it control me and consume every ounce of me to the point I didn’t have a brain that was controlled by Samantha anymore. I felt like I was in a video game. My brain was controlled by other people, not only Christina’s dad. Letting go of the toxicity was the best thing I could have done for not only me, but the most important person in my life… Christina.
The rest was history. If I didn’t leave, I would have been miserable and depressed. I wouldn’t be the mother and woman I am today.
On my level. This term is not used by me for any reason other than mental health and maturity. At some point, I did a total life flip and priority switch. I guess you can say it happened when I had Christina. But I didn’t do most of my growing until I was about a year into my career. It took a lot of uncomfortable situations and doing things I normally wouldn’t do with people I wouldn’t normally do things with. A lot of blood, sweat and tears. But I can honestly say, I wouldn’t change it for the world. I wouldn’t be who I am today and wouldn’t be growing the way I am, without this process. You need to trust the process and just go with it.
So, how does all of this tie into the purpose of this post? Well, in sharing my personal experience, you can see how certain people’s mood and behavior can deflect you from being… YOU. I wanted my true colors to shine through, especially once I became a mother. I wanted my love to spread to others and make a difference in people’s lives. How can I do this when I hit a huge roadblock ? Which way do I turn when it feels like either way is a dead end ? Well, you pick the opposite road of what you are traveling down now and build more road after the dead end. Keep going. If someone or something is holding you back from being you, why do you continue to entertain it ? We were not put on this earth to live for other people’s happiness. Maybe to some extent we were, but not to the point of losing ourselves or not letting our true colors shine through.
True colors. Ha! Trolls. Who loves this movie? “So don’t be afraid to let them show, your true colors, true colors are beautiful.” If you want to be happy at 7AM on a Monday, don’t let the gump in the office tell you to be anything other than happy. If you want to love every person you come in contact with and get to know people for who they really are, don’t let shallow, miserable people get in the way of that.
Just be you. Don’t let society’s views of perfection change you. If you love unconditionally, it will eventually stick. Someone will catch on along the way and start to spread it themselves. And so on. Hopefully, someday this will cause a big love train movement and we will all be happy and love each other. Big dreams, huh ? I think it can happen. ALWAYS dream big.
With that being said, I’m going to drift off into dream land.